I only sat for the LSAT once in November, 2019. I scheduled to sit for the exam in November, 2019 and January, 2020 in case that my first score was not sufficient. But I ended up cancelling the January, 2020 exam and here are my reasons Why I Decided To Cancel My LSAT Retake:

I was Stressed Out

It’s as simple as that.

Applying to law school was incredibly stressful. While I was applying to law school, I was attending therapy and addressing my mental health issues. Through focusing on myself, I realized how I was not coping well with the stresses of applying to law school.

I was so anxious that I didn’t even look at my score on LSAC for weeks after it was available on my LSAC account. Additionally, I was going crazy chasing down my letters of recommendation for months. Having my future in someone else’s hands – someone who didn’t take this process as serious as I was – garnered the most stress for me.

I just wasn’t mentally in the right space to sit for the test. Not only did I not prepare for the retake, but I was not at my best mentally. I spent a lot of therapy sessions unpacking how stressful this whole process was, and how much I wanted to get it over with. It was affecting my sleep schedule, my appetite, and my productivity at work.

So for the sake of my mental health, I cancelled my LSAT retake.

My Score Was Good Enough For Me

I scored a 157 on the LSAT. Not too bad. Although it may not seem super competitive, especially compared to reddit, top-law-schools.com, and other online law school forums that preach that you need a score over 160 or you shouldn’t go to law school at all, its actually at the 70% percentile rank of LSAT scores. And for most of my school list, my LSAT score actually fell above the 75 percentile of their incoming class’ LSAT score.

Because I scored over the 75 percentile for the vast majority of my preferred law schools, my score was good enough for me.

Additionally, for my top choices, a 157 would not only get me admitted, but I’d also most likely be given some scholarship money as well.

Could I have studied and retaken the exam for an even better score? Absolutely.

Would I have received more scholarship money if I had a higher score? Yup.

Did I *need* to take the LSAT given my goals? Nope, so I cancelled my LSAT retake knowing that I was satisfied with my score.

I Wanted To Move Forward

I desperately wanted this process to be over.

I’ve wanted to apply to law school since the middle of 2018 and initially studied very briefly for the LSAT in Spring 2018. I started a freelancing and consulting business in the DMV area after a rough start in my paralegal career. Thankfully, I loved my business when it started, and I still appreciate all the lessons I’ve learned by going out on my own. Also, I think that working as a paralegal before law school and taking several gap years prior to law school was the best choice for me.

Frankly, I was growing tired of being a freelance paralegal. Although I love my attorney-clients, I’m not the right person – in personality and ambition – to be a paralegal long-term. This career was always a means to an end, with the end being a practicing attorney.

And when you’re freelance, your personal finance journey is drastically different than when you are an employee. You eat what you kill. There are no vacation days, no benefits, etc. The financial stress was becoming greater than my enjoyment of the work. And going back to being an employee was not an option.

I wanted to move to the next phase of my life: law school!

COVID-19

On top of all that, the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world and the legal industry particularly hard. Many solo practitioners and law firms have had to adapt quickly to an unprecedented force in the market. Considering how laggardly the legal industry is with any sort of change (this is the same industry that notoriously still lives in the last 30 decades), you can imagine how my client base SHRUNK over the past few months.

This pandemic and how many attorneys have had to retract their budgets and businesses has reiterated my trepidation in continuing or keeping my business. Support staff in law firms aren’t nearly as valued as I want to be and there isn’t really much of a market for me to continue thriving.

I’m ready to go to law school, and I did not want to postpone my journey anymore.

So now you know why I cancelled my LSAT retake. In retrospect, I wish I had studied more for the exam and perhaps retaken it for a higher score. But I’ll write more about why I wish I studied harder for the LSAT later and update this post.